Longing for His Presence
I’m sitting on my bed in my dormroom the early hours of this morning thinking about the presence of God. I’m graduating soon and topmost on my mind is finding a new christian community. As much as I know that the presence of God is with me wherever I go, I cannot underestimate the importance of a committed, anointed church congregation. I’d prefer a smaller church where I can be fed directly from God through His servant without too much church politics and protocol. I was speaking about this with a friend of mine last night and sharing how the most important thing for me after graduation is my new church home and second is launching a career at a place that I’d be driven and motivated.
I've been feeling an especially heavy burden to serve through church, through my work, my blog, and in everything that I do. Serving God is one of those christian cliches that get thrown around a lot. But I earnestly pray that each of us has the opportunity to really labor for Jesus. I don’t mean this in the context of the missions field only, but within our various communities.
Growing up, the biggest joy in my life was found in the House of God. I had a loving family and a wonderful home, but I found incomparable solace in the house of God. Since I started catechism classes at 8, I have remained close to the house of God. I served as an altar server in my local church and continued in secondary school, until I eventually served as chapel prefect.
I remember one night vividly, praying at mass that I would be appointed Chapel Prefect. As much as I knew that my ability to serve God wouldn’t exactly be dictated by my position, I still wanted to serve God in that very specific capacity. That evening during mass, I challenged the Lord. I asked Him to entrust the spiritual lives of His children to my care, in my small capacity as chapel prefect. I promised not to let Him down. It wasn’t about the perks of being a student leader or of having some measure of power over my peers, although that was nice. I really just wanted the opportunity to lead prayer and prepare for important spiritual ceremonies in school.
The Lord granted my desire and above being a prefect, I felt immensely honored to be chapel prefect. In fact, I lost my prefect badge (which was the physically indication of your student leadership position) about a month after I got it, mostly because of my own carelessness, but also because it meant little compared to the service that I was rendering to God.
Of course there's a lot that I'd do differently, six years on, but I know for sure that I was completely passionate about my position (even to the detriment of my school work lol). I gave it my everything and till date, I do not regret that one bit.
After secondary school, I served as a student leader in my A’Levels christian community. At school, the Lord used friends to build my faith, the closest of whom was my friend Priscilla. This is why I remain indebted to God for Priscilla’s friendship. She taught me how to live out my faith when I didn’t have the support systems that I had in my catholic boarding school.
Now at college, I’ve been an active member of our college campus fellowship and it’s been a place of solace and succor. It’s been a place where we’ve encountered God and grown tremendously in our faith.
Basically, I've given you this entire backstory just so you're convinced that I cannot imagine my life without a physical place where I can fully serve God. The few weeks where it's happened over the past two summers haven't been my greatest times with God. I've done things I regret and made decisions I wish I could correct. I certainly do not want that for my life.
A few months shy of my graduation, I find myself seeking a christian community where I can continue to grow. It’s great to livestream services from my computer in the comfort of my bedroom, but it’s even more special when I have people to interact with and grow with. I want God to teach me how to serve Him within a ministry as an adult. I want him to teach me what it means to be diligent, disciplined, and obedient to spiritual authority.
That’s my only prayer for my life after graduation.
I know that if I find a place where I can freely serve and seek God, everything else will fall in place.
Will you join me in prayer?
Featured image from Giphy.